The Fears Of A Soon To Be Husband

A young man I am now, a husband I hope to become

In hopes that I can teach my Son or Daughter lessons from the wrongs I’ve done

Teaching my Son that its better to learn from the experience of others

Its good to want to love a woman but first you have to love your Mother

To my daughters I hope to teach them to guard their hearts

To think of themselves as beautiful women because God creates works of art

Never let a man give your womanhood its worth.

Know that when you plan on having sex, consider also a child potential being birthed

I hope to teach my Sons lessons I’ve learned thru my parents marriage

That sometimes love isn’t always about the horse or the carriage

But its about being able to love the one your with even when its hard

Being willing to let your love heal emotionally scars

That being a man consists of responsibilities

Being a protector and a provider as well as other unseen duties

But most importantly I hope to teach my kids about the God that exists

And also teach of about the temptations of the devil in which they must resists

With all this being said, I too have fears

Fears that at times seem too much to bare

Filled with doubts and whats ifs about this idea of a good husband

Like what if I’m not able to be man enough to be one

Its easy to teach others but to follow your own teachings isn’t

Because truth be told truth is easier spoken than it is to actually live it

Its hard not to let the failed relationships and marriages around me affect me

I can love my wife to death but would I still give her reason to say “He neglected me”?

I’ve always said I’ll be a better husband than my dad was to my mother

But will I overlook the small stuff like occasionally telling my wife I love her?

Will I be more consumed  with my life than the life of my wife?

Will I love my wife so much that I’m actually giving her time I should be giving to Christ?

Instead of being the provider will I be the one she provides for?

Instead of protecting me with truth, will I be the one she’ll have to lie for?

Will I know how to sacrifice for the betterment of our marriage?

Or will the stress of the marriage be more than I thought I could manage?

I’ve always said I’d never end up in a divorce

But will my wife want a divorce because I found myself sleeping with women of all sorts?

Some may say questions like these shouldn’t be asked.

Well why do you think marriages today don’t last?

Because thoughts like these somehow were overlooked or never questions.

Or no one thought long enough to know that questions like these are just an suggestion

Of what should go through the mind of a man wanting to marry one day.

Truthfully I hope I can marry and make my wife and my life really happy some day.

And give to her what my mother never received from my dad

Fill her memories and her thoughts of us being happy instead of sad

These are just some of the thought that has been in my head lately

God willing I won’t have to say “I’ll make a good husband” and consider the word maybe